A Shock To The Heart...

Wowie! What a week I had last week! So I am late on my post but I have been in a daze for a few days. So this week at work I spent a lot of time doing random not too fun jobs. Lots of organizing to prepare for Meghan's return from China. Luckily Sacha was super awesome and decided that the office should get Friday off, so we got a nice extended weekend! So this is where the real fun comes in! Since I knew I was gonna have to be up early on Friday for work I went out Thursday night. I went with my girlfriend from church named Ashley and her husband, N.H., to a Reggae concert on Santa Monica Beach! It was awesome! The concert was free so that was great and all the hippies just dancin to the music...I was in Heaven! Ashley and I rocked it out to some Reggae remixes and some amazing singing for change. Santa Monica Beach was super cool with its street performers, authentic wooden pier, Farris wheel, and roller coaster! In the middle of the concert another friend from my new ward, Andrew, called me and wanted to know if I wanted to go out with some other people from the ward for a hike. I was super thrilled at the idea of seeing some of Cali's nature and environment and getting to spend the day in the great outdoors. As we struggled to hear each other over the blaring reggae I told him not to worry I have hiked a ton and that "I'm from Oklahoma, I'm an outdoorsy girl!". Needless to say all I got out of the description of the hike was that I should bring water and some dry food snacks, they planned to leave at 8:30, and that they would pick me up. That morning I got up and started getting ready at 6:30 am so that I could make sure to get down to Ralph's and get some good trail snacks. I got ready and pumped up and was waiting an extra 30 minutes past expected time as the boys drug around getting ready. We were finally off and the boys had a great plan of parking one car at the end of the hike so that we could drive back to the other car at the end instead of having to walk back. I realized this was a great game plan when I saw the expected 4 hours time estimate on the hiking map. Andrew had mapped us out to hike through the narrows of one of California's National Forest, one of which he had never hiked before; part of the reason why he wanted to go! The hiked started out with an incredibly steep incline downwards. I realized quickly that hiking in California is very different from hiking in Oklahoma or Arkansas. You see California has mountains, and their forest are very dry and dessert like. So as we started our trek we all more or less rolled down a slippery slope of loose unreliable rocks and sand. Of course not but half way down I choose a bad rock and much like an MXC blooper real I took a slide on my butt and suffered my first injury of the day on my wrist. It didn't look bad just a small scratch not even really bleeding so I brushed it of and kept going. I came to the conclusion that this hike was going to be a great challenge to me and began to look at the hike as 4 hours of torture as opposed to 4 hours of awesomeness! I have never rock climbed and I realized that there was going to be a lot of that today. I also came quick to realize that I didn't hear all of the previous nights details and that we would be wading/swimming water several times and I wore NO swim suit and a white shirts...great. It was a hot day though and luckily I never went in water over thigh deep and the sun dried us in less than 5 minutes each time. After getting to a really "narrow" part of our trail we started looking for alternative routes around the area. Andrew hoped up the side of a rock and headed higher up for a new course and another one of the guys, Rob, had decided to to just climb up the side of a rock wall cause he saw many foot holes and thought it would be easier. His climb up started to look a little shaky and the last of the guys I was with, Scott, ran up the rock path to help him up. Things were scary for a few minutes as Rob really lost his grip and began to fall and I came to the shock in my mind that I may really have to seriously help here and I doubted my very small and extremely weak muscles (I had seen a personal trainer at my gym two nights before and its always day two for me that I really start to feel the burn so that made the hike EXTRA difficult). Luckily Scott was fearless and knew just what to do and hoisted Rob right up the rock side after some initial troubles. The phrase "We're gonna have some awesome testimonies for Sunday" was said multiple times. About 15 minutes after that we realized there was not really any good trail leads from here and with our morning scares perhaps we should just have lunch and then head back, which was the popular consensus! I came home and went straight to the shower in my tennis shoes that needed a good rinse of after the continuous water to sand pattern. I was trying to slip into what was sure to be an amazing nap when I got a phone call from Andrew asking if I wanted to go to a Los Angeles Angels baseball game with him and Scott. This sounded like an awesome idea and I love baseball so despite my tired body I drug my weak body out of my bed and dressed in some red to represent to home team! I guys picked me up and we were off! The game was so fun and we got some super cheap seats with I great view! We watched the Angeles loose and learned about the Rally Monkey and watched an amazing choreographed firework show to music at the games end! The next day was the 4th of July and I had planned to hit Newport Beach for the night where there were going to be lots of people our age and a ton of fun I was told several times by co-workers. Caroline's boyfriend Chanze was in town and they decided to join me on my 4th of July journey. We got out to Newport pretty quickly surprisingly and spent almost an equivalent amount of time just looking for a spot to park. There were people EVERYWHERE as well as body parts! There was certainly no dress code in any area. The whole "No shoes, No shirt, No service" rule could never apply here. Streets were filled with people and traffic laws no longer existed. Once finally parking we walked out to the beach and realized it was way colder than it was in LA and I was super mad I had wore my swimsuit all day for nothing! We walked the beach for a little bit and then wondered off for some dinner. We ate at an awesome restaurant with the friendliest service ever. After that we headed back to the beach and found a good wind block behind some tents to watch the fireworks. A group of random people, around our age, came running up beside us with a giant teddy bear and plotted down less than a foot beside me. They were laughing and began a quick conversation about smokin some weed or coke. I just tried not to hear then and focused on the amazing sunset in front of me. Later the group all got up and ran off leaving behind a girl and guy of the group. Which quickly advanced into the two of them basically having sex ON ME! I freaked the ef out!! When I heard some things I couldn't take it anymore and told them to please go take that somewhere that was not on me. They laughed apologized and ran off with the giant teddy bear. From that point I could enjoy the nights fireworks that were far less impressive than the nights before. The next day I went to church and was invited by Andrew to have a family dinner with his family and then go wave some cruise ships off, something their family likes to do on Sunday. I happily agreed. When I got home I got a phone call from Nathan, who had already called me a couple times before during church. I had also gotten several phone calls from my family that day, strangely during church as well. Nathan asked me if I had heard the news around Pocola. I told him "No, whats going on? Is that why everyone's been calling me?" He told me with reservation in his voice and words that my best friend from high school, Chris Bryan, had died. My initial shock didn't allow this to sink in. As it set on the surface of my brain I rambled about this is why everyone has been trying to call me, and then in sunk in like a thousand bricks tied to my ankle, pulling me down deeper and deeper at incredible speeds. I broke into uncontrollable sobs and had to excuse myself from my phone call. I couldn't believe it! I was so angry at myself. Chris grew up out here in California and we used to spend bus rides home talking about the stuff he would do out here and I had been meaning to call him for the past 2 weeks to share with him all that I had been doing that we used to discuss. I hated myself for forgetting and hated even more when I realized that I was not going to be there for his services and that my only choice is to go home and visit his graveside. Even writing it now doesn't seem like a reality, one that I can tell I am quickly trying to block to the very most unavoidable moment. I found out that he had overdosed and this thought broke my heart. I could hear his laugh, see his smile, hear him say my name. The confused blur that this is gone now. I'm sick that I can't go home and be there with him. Even though I know that he's already gone all I want to do is go sit with him. I just can't understand it...I don't want to. I know my town is small and I know our entire class will be there and me, his best friend, not being there makes me sick. I just wanna come home. I forced myself not to break my previous made plans and went with swollen sunglass covered eyes to dinner with Andrew's family and felt the comfort of a family and little sisters. It was a nice distraction to reality. We went and waved off the cruise ships after dinner which was really fun. After that Andrew took me to the Donald Trump golf course that has a trail down to the ocean side and let me just have some thinking time as the sun set. I had never been to an ocean that had a rock shore. The noise of the water hitting the rocks and pulling back was the sound track to my still thoughts. His kindness was amazing and really just the present yet along company I needed. I wish more than anything that I was at home right now with Chris and that this great tragedy would not have occured. I fear though that for now the bricks tied to this reality will not hit the ocean's floor of understanding until I am home and go to what will have to be my excepted time of understanding and closure with my friend.

Xs and Os

~Leslie